one might say we're banned from that church
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize