Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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