he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Randomize