chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
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