at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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