Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
