I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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