Capitaan dildo arrescate!
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
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