Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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