I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Your penis caused this!
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