We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
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