come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Randomize
