Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Everyone says I win the strip club
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
