He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
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