i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
