no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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