That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
