last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
