you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
