Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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