Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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