I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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