Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize