I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
