help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
