If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize