You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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