Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
you had me at cake vodka
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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