Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
