yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
He shit in the fireplace
Randomize
