I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
