I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
