Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
