I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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