But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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