I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
