i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Randomize
