went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
