im gay
i know
yea but for you.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
