it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
