She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
