If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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