so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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