your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
