Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize