on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Randomize
