too bad you live with your parents still
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
My ass is underappreciated
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
