Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
where are my eyebrows?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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