She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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