he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
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