I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Randomize
