Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
